Funny pics

Nxvak · Posted: 15 Mar 2011 04:34 am Post subject:

Nxvak · Posted: 15 Mar 2011 04:43 am Post subject:

HOW TO MEET THE GIRL OF YOUR DREAMS (FOOLPROOF)

Buy a falconer’s glove.

Approach the girl you like wearing the falconers glove.

Ask her “Excuse me, have you seen a falcon fly by here?”

Look up to the sky, hopeful/sad.

If she says “No,” look distraught and ask her if she wouldn’t mind helping you look for your falcon.

No human being would ever turn down an opportunity like this.

Use the time you spend together searching for the falcon to get to know her.

At the end of your search (10 minutes) you will probably need consoling re: the loss of your one true friend.

By this point her interest in you based on the fact that you were able to put so much love and time into the raising of a falcon will more than ensure a second date, and from there it’s just a hop skip and a jump to marriage.

Good luck!

*NOTE: If by chance a falcon does appear out of nowhere, simply say ” (falcon’s name) I’ve missed you so much! Don’t ever scare me like that again!” Then offer to take the girl to dinner for helping you find your lost falcon. Bonus: You just got a free falcon!

Nxvak · Posted: 15 Mar 2011 04:44 am Post subject:

Nxvak · Posted: 15 Mar 2011 04:46 am Post subject:

Nxvak · Posted: 15 Mar 2011 04:49 am Post subject:

Nxvak · Posted: 15 Mar 2011 04:55 am Post subject:

Nxvak · Posted: 15 Mar 2011 05:18 am Post subject:

Nxvak · Posted: 15 Mar 2011 05:20 am Post subject:

Nxvak · Posted: 15 Mar 2011 05:23 am Post subject:

Courses for Women

Taught by men, for women.

101
Avoiding Walking in Front of the TV

102
Doing Housework Without Complaining

103
Shopping: Buying What You Can Afford, Not What You Can Charge

104
Going to The Washroom Alone
(formerly Coping Without My Friends)

105
Understanding the Male Response to "Do I Look OK?"

106
Exercise: How it Keeps You from Looking Like Your Mother

107
Learning How to Initiate Intimacy

108
How to Apologize When You Are Obviously Wrong

109
Understanding the Male Response to "Am I Fat?"

110
Dishwashers: Rinsing Before Is Not a Must

111
The Toilet Seat: I Can Learn to Put It Down Too

112
Using the Thesaurus: Alternatives to "Make Love"

113
"The Weekend" and "Long Boring Walks" Are Not Synonymous

114
How to Go Shopping With Your Mate and Not Embarrass Him

115
The Remote Control: Don't Touch What You Can't Handle

116
You Too Can Be the One to Hang Up the Phone

117
Honest, You Don't Look Like Kim Bassinger – But You're Acceptable

118
Hairspray: The Effects On The Ecosystem
(formerly One Can Is Enough)

119
Runs In Your Nylons? It's Not the End of the World

120
Fishing: Being Able to Bait Your Own Hook

121
Intimacy: More Than Just Lying There

122
Learning to Choose What to Wear In Less Than Four Hours

123
Vacations: Doing Without 4 Suitcases

124
Makeup: The Less is More Theory

125
Nagging: Stop the Insanity!

Courses for Men

Taught by women, for men.

101
Combating Stupidity

102
You Too Can Do Housework

103
P.M.S. – Learning When To Keep Your Mouth Shut

104
How To Fill An Ice Cube Tray

105
We Do Not Want Sleazy Underthings for Christmas –
Give Us Money

106
Understanding the Female Response To You Coming In Drunk
At 4 AM

107
Wonderful Laundry Techniques
(Formerly "Don't Wash My Silks")

108
Parenting – No, It Doesn't End With Conception

109
Get a Life – Learn How To Cook

110
How Not To Act Like a Butthead When You Are Obviously Wrong

111
Spelling – Even You Can Get It Right

112
Understanding Your Financial Incompetence

113
You – The Weaker Sex

114
Reasons To Give Flowers

115
How To Stay Awake After

116
Why It Is Unacceptable To Relieve Yourself
Anywhere But the Bathroom

117
Garbage – Getting It To the Curb

118A
You Can Fall Asleep Without It If You Really Try

118B
The Morning Dilemma - If It's Awake, Take a Shower

119
The Weekend and Sports Are Not Synonymous

120
How To Put The Toilet Seat Down

121
How To Go Shopping With Your Mate and Not Get Lost

122
The Remote Control – Overcoming Your Dependency

123
Helpful Postural Hints For Couch Potatoes

124
How Not To Act Younger Than Your Children

125
You Too Can Be a Designated Driver

126
Honest, You Don't Look Like Mel Gibson, Especially When Naked

127
Changing Your Underwear – It Really Works

128
The Attainable Goal – Omitting %@#*! From Your Vocabulary

129
Fluffing the Blankets After Farting is Not Necessary

130
Real Men Ask For Directions

131
How To Take Illness Like a Man

Nxvak · Posted: 15 Mar 2011 05:25 am Post subject:

Nxvak · Posted: 15 Mar 2011 05:36 am Post subject: