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Cancerous
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 #1 Posted: 13 Apr 2011 04:21 am Post subject: My penis trolled me. |
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I'm on a holiday to the city and got drunk with my brother and his friends last night, first time properly going out ever.
Woke up this morning completely naked next to one of his friends at her house.
Couldn't remember her name.
Couldn't remember how we got there last night.
Couldn't remember if we had sex/what we did.
So we both wake up with a fucking terrible hangover, start making out more, I make her orgasm (hands of magic) and she grabs a rubber.
She starts giving me a handjob and says "I feel intimidated by your massive cock".
But then I was too big to be able to get in and I sadfaced
Also, she's 3 years older than me and has a boyfriend.
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Zubair
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| #2 Posted: 13 Apr 2011 04:24 am Post subject: |
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I had this problem happen to me too.
And then I woke up and fapped furiously 'cause I didn't finish in the dream.
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Giantbob
LazyBob
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| #3 Posted: 13 Apr 2011 04:28 am Post subject: |
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being too big is a problem for us awesome people. Gotta live with it, bub.
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Cancerous
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| #4 Posted: 13 Apr 2011 04:28 am Post subject: |
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It's not something you want to happen to you.
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Zubair
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| #5 Posted: 13 Apr 2011 04:34 am Post subject: |
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You should have just fashioned your hair to look like a penis and banged her with your hair.
Think outside of the box.
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Nate
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| #6 Posted: 13 Apr 2011 07:58 am Post subject: |
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My advice to you.. Where there's a will there's a way!
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Vassago
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| #7 Posted: 13 Apr 2011 08:38 am Post subject: |
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but daddy plays poker and drinks lots of beer
then he wants sex that involves mommy's rear
daddy has sores on his naughty parts oozing with pus
i think thats why mommy left us
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Bo$$
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| #8 Posted: 13 Apr 2011 09:45 am Post subject: |
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| D2jsp makes your dick smaller. Try it out! |
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DamagedSoul
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| #9 Posted: 13 Apr 2011 10:05 am Post subject: |
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| Bo$$ wrote: | | D2jsp makes your dick smaller. Try it out! |
This = The Truth : (
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If your looking for a Clan to join check out HoDII http://www.d3jsp.org/clans.php?action=clanpage&clan=30 |
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Basi
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| #10 Posted: 13 Apr 2011 12:15 pm Post subject: |
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try having a girlfriend that says "it hurts everytime you put it in can i give you a handjob instead?"
im surprised that relationship lasted the entire 3 months... |
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D-Walk
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| #11 Posted: 13 Apr 2011 12:20 pm Post subject: |
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Try waking up and realizing that you could have quite possible impregnated yourself in your sleep
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Basi
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| #12 Posted: 13 Apr 2011 12:22 pm Post subject: |
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| D-Walk wrote: | Try waking up and realizing that you could have quite possible impregnated yourself in your sleep
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"oshi...," exclaimed mary |
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PiNk ℳℯẘℳεẘ
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| #13 Posted: 13 Apr 2011 12:54 pm Post subject: |
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I thought you were with Megan? o-o
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Ricky
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| #14 Posted: 13 Apr 2011 01:02 pm Post subject: |
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| GET OUT OF MY HEAD!!! |
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Satan
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| #15 Posted: 13 Apr 2011 01:58 pm Post subject: |
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| I once fingered a girl who pussy was so small I could literally hardly get my middle finger in her....lol |
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Nate
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| #16 Posted: 13 Apr 2011 04:00 pm Post subject: |
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| Satan wrote: | | I once fingered a girl who pussy was so small I could literally hardly get my middle finger in her....lol |
Remember 10 will get you 20 =P
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Giantbob
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| #17 Posted: 13 Apr 2011 05:37 pm Post subject: |
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Satan
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| #18 Posted: 13 Apr 2011 05:53 pm Post subject: |
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| She was 18 Nate! FU |
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Cancerous
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| #19 Posted: 13 Apr 2011 06:02 pm Post subject: |
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| Bo$$ wrote: | | D2jsp makes your dick smaller. Try it out! |
D2jsp didn't believe my story.
| nyuu wrote: | | I thought you were with Megan? o-o |
That was for trolling purposes.
But she's got/getting an irl boyfriend now, and doesn't use jsp much so not much point any more.
| Basi wrote: | try having a girlfriend that says "it hurts everytime you put it in can i give you a handjob instead?"
im surprised that relationship lasted the entire 3 months... |
Been there, done that.
But I was never even able to get it in, she said it was really painful trying to put a 2nd finger in there.
>Meet her
>Her: "I'd never let a guy finger me"
>Finger her that night.
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Basi
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| #20 Posted: 13 Apr 2011 07:54 pm Post subject: |
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3 words
is megan hot |
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